The devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.
The greatest trick I ever pulled was sacrificing myself to save the world, guarantee the ascension of my allies to godhood, and make them question their own noble and heroic natures.
So, it ended, in the most epic of fashions. The Seven of Steel was reunited: Maxius the LG Crusader of Heironiu, grumpy goody-two-shoes stick in the mud; Pentus, LN Monk of Cyndor, not quite OCD, and humorless but not-not OCD; Tirah, CG elven Bladesinger, Sleeyag through and through; Kallr, tough grugach ranger, of course still plays with bunnies, but kicks major ass; Dwin, spellfilcher, lover of Tirah, sleeyag; Uyag Gnarlfist, 1/2 giant gladiator, 1/2 of the BAMF team, and my BFF, and me, Damien Abisson, blade bard, rabble-rouser, trash-talker, and voted most likely to irritate everyone else in the party!
First we finally got our hands on the Tarrasque. Uyag, of course beat it. Uyag also had my sword (most might know it as the Sword of Kas, but it truly is the Sword of Damien), but was all pouty because I hadn’t visited. Sorry, Yagger, I was busy underground railroading people to safety. You know, helping people. Plus, I think Uyag might have taken to wearing an old-man diaper, 1/2 Giants don’t age that well. I swapped it out with my duplicate, because that’s how I roll.
Tarrasque went down, because we truly are BAMFs, and oh yeah, we had descended to godhood, because some black tentacley thing was killing all the gods. Blah blah blah Pentus and Dwin said words that I am sure were important.
We had to deal with Iuz, and Ivid, and Vecna. We went in that order, not before Pentus one-touch death-punched our frenemy Majere Arctus, nihilist and all-around jerk. Tirah pouted a bit, thinking maybe we shouldn’t have one-pounched him to death. If he hadn’t been an utter jerk maybe he’d still be alive.
Iuz first, and his Fiend-Knights. We killed him dead. Next, we had to bring the smack-down on some guards in the Great Kingdom protecting Ivid, and, to the surprise of no one, Damien had the highest body-count. Again, that’s how I roll. Uyag and Kallir might be more effective, but I look better.
Ivid is a big ole baby, and ran away after I brought the hurt.
We went to fight Vecna, of course, and he had gotten all necro-magic on his Frenemy Kas and we had to get through Kas first. Dwin stripped him naked, except for his mantle, and Pentus rewound time so Uyag could break it. I challenged him to a duel, he accepted, and hurt me dead, but Maxius hooked a brother up and raised me from the deadbook. And then, when his mantle was gone, I told him I’d give him his sword back after we killed Vecna. I was lying, but not really, because I didn’t have his sword, he wanted to call my sword his. That was his mistake. God of Deception, hello.
So, we jumped to Vecna’s plane. We hadn’t had the best of times there in the past. D’oh, Dwin had brain-farted and realized we needed to close some sort of gate and we should have done that before coming here. Silly sleeyags, always forgetting stuff that might save the world. Dwin ran away to seal the gate, and no doubt trap us all here, to die. Leaving Dwin and Ivid as the only deities on Oerth. But as Luck would have it, the gate was still open, and I was able to try and get all my allies and myself through it before it closed, trapping Vecna in his realm, powerless as a deity, and soon to be appetizer for the black mass of tentacles chomping on all the other gods.
I’m a Lucky cat, it’s one of my domains. So, this was a “as luck would have it moment.” Maxius was an old man, and probably just wanted to get home and watch golf, Pentus of course, thought me up to no good, and resisted. So, it all came down to a roll. Pentus could be a big jerk. I rolled my d20, and, as fate would have it this day:
NATURAL 20! Pentus had no recourse and was through the portal, leaving me and Vecna, but fate was not done this day. I had to roll to get myself through.
Thus, my fate was sealed, and I would be devoured, along with my sword and my new best frenemy Vecna, by the black mass of tentacles. Ewwww.
But every hero there that day, they know, that fate stepped in and made my sacrifice the most noble. Faced against a power greater than our might combined, one hero stood above them all, and sacrificed himself so that Oerth could be the one world saved, so that my friends and allies might take their place as mighty gods. But only one individual from that day will have worshipers of all the seven deities tithe in his name. The greatest hero of all, Damien Abisson.
And like that, he’s gone.
The greatest trick the greatest hero ever pulled was convincing the world he was a jerk, a reluctant ally worthy of disdain and mistrust.
El Jefe was getting the gang back together for a birthday game for The Jen, and this time it was a reunion of the Lords of the Land, AKA The Seven of Steel. For many years, Jeff had resisted revisiting this 2e campaign, having moved past 2e, but not happy with anything that has come along since. I made my pitch for a 13th Age version, because anyone who knows me knows I love the 13th Age! El Jefe wasn’t biting. But when the announcement went out, he declared he had finally found the system, a retro-clone worthy of the Seven of Steel.
My tastes and play-style have changed, and I made a pitch for Damien having found love and mellowed in the years since the team went their separate ways. El Jefe could neither confirm nor deny my unrequited love (his notes had no mention of it).
What El Jefe was doing was being very cagey about the system. It was not until our first combat, with the Tarrasque, that we all felt imbued, and he delivered unto us our sheets of character, tomes worthy of godhood indeed, as we had become Godbound!
Trouble was, we were only 1st level godlings.
But, it was great. As is my wont, if I play a game, I buy the game, it is my way of supporting the industry I love so, and so El Jefe handed me his copy.
The game itself was a great deal of fun, it captured the epic nature of our characters and our enemies, and as disappointed as I am that my character is the only one that isn’t living the good life as a god on Oerth, I take solace in the fact that every member of the Seven who always thought Damien more trouble than he was worth knows that I willingly sacrificed myself so that they all may live, and so that every being remaining in existence would be able to draw breath. And they will know that I did it, and not them.
Because, that is the kind of
jerk hero Damien is.
And, i am looking forward to playing around with this game and system, as it scratches an itch I have had for some time, a game that allows for players to take on the role of gods.